July 03, 2008

Colories!

I've decided to celebrate Colorado's co-distinction as the skinniest state AND the largest beer producer in the nation with a semi-solid margarita made of tequila, lard, buttermilk, beer and sugar. Put down your bikes, shed your crampons, renounce your gym memberships and and join me, Colorado. Join me.

Posted by Bree at 01:18 PM | Comments (0)

June 18, 2008

Teacher's Pet at the Buntport

This Monday, Buntport will host the latest installment of its open-mic show "Teacher's Pet." The theme is "I'm a People Person: Lies Told in Resumes and During Job Interviews."

Sign up to tell your story to the audience and to the entire metro area as KBDI Channel 12 will be there. Sign up starts at 8 p.m., the show at 9 p.m. and free beer at beer p.m.

Still in doubt you'll have a good time? Ah, doubters! For you, I post this, the above, a picture of me and Hannah (one of the founders of Buntport) from junior year in college.

Note my 1997 eyebrows and, uh...awesome shirt...which I stole from MY BROTHER.
See how Hannah makes me laugh despite my appearance.
Laugh, Bree, laugh.
Let Hannah make you laugh as well.
Support independent theater.
Support Denver's cultural institutions.
Support Team Buntport.

Posted by Bree at 11:18 AM | Comments (0)

May 31, 2008

Datey McDates (and TWO Five Word Movie Reviews)

Matt and I went on a special sojourn last night that did not involve either the dogs or Home Depot. That's right. A DATE. I even wore earrings.

We had dinner at Encore (the new restaurant attached to the new Tattered Cover) and many drinks later (word, they had ZOLO - made RIGHT HERE!), went to see The Visitor at the Neighborhood Flix joint attached. The Visitor was somewhat somnolent. Indeed, I had come up with my five word review PRIOR to seeing the movie, which I stand by ("Strange combination: cloying and genuine") but Matt's came mid-way when he said loudly, "Molasses uphill in the winter."

But the best part? Neighborhood Flix has loooove seats with ottomans where you can snuggle up to your sweetness (or, you know, "get to third") with no one any the wiser. Or that's what I told myself the second time I fell asleep sprawled all over Matt like a cheap date suit. Suffice it, I left the theater with my head ducked hoping no one had heard our commentary or our snoring. BUT I highly recommend the place. And hope that other theaters start following their lead in terms of having a full bar, decent independent movies and a place to catch a snooze. It's like a mozzarella, basil and tomato combo...it just works. Someone alert Images. Please.

Posted by Bree at 09:41 AM | Comments (0)

May 28, 2008

Barbara Corcoran Ranks Denver in Top Five "Friendliest" Cities

Denver, Colorado: When your first building is a saloon, you know you’re a friendly town

“Denver has the easygoing and friendly nature indicative of the Midwest. Various cocktail parties sport the ‘Colorado casual’ look, which is everything from sequins and silk to jeans and cowboy boots or stiletto heels.” — Patti Johnson, Denver real estate broker

Did you know?

* Downtown in the Mile High City is one big, car-free “pedestrian mall” lined with shops, bars and restaurants where locals and tourists alike hang out. There’s even a free shuttle bus that runs along the main street.

* Denver is one of only two cities in America with eight professional sports teams.

* The first permanent structure in Denver was a saloon. Talk about hospitality.

* A cultural melting pot, Denver hosts the country’s largest Cinco de Mayo festival, the Longs Peak Scottish Festival, the National Gay Rodeo Finals, PrideFest, and it has the Black American West Museum in the historically rich African-American Five Points neighborhood. Its population is 40 percent Hispanic and 10 percent African-American.

* The city also boasts comprehensive accessibility services like wheelchair-friendly trails and accommodations and transportation services for the physically impaired.

* Denver will host the Democratic National Convention this August. For the convention, Bikes Belong will supply the city with 1,000 bicycles to be used in a system similar to that in Paris (credit card access; rates are lowest for short jaunts around the city). Seventy will be left behind as a legacy that Denver plans to grow into a city-wide public transportation system of several hundred bikes.

* The median single-family home sales price is $223,500.

Posted by Bree at 03:26 PM | Comments (2)

April 16, 2008

Denver Ghost Walk (Boo!)

Many of you already know about this one, but for those of you in the area who are unawares:

May 31: Ghost Walk, 7-9 pm
Meet in front of the statue of the Indian on the east side of the Capitol on Grant Street between 14th and Colfax avenues. $15.

The tour is given by Phil Goodstein, author of The Ghosts of Denver: Capitol Hill. I'm not sure if you have to register beforehand but, if so, the contact number is (303) 333-1095.

Posted by Bree at 01:27 PM | Comments (0)

April 09, 2008

What Did You Learn Today?

Matt asked me that last night when we were falling asleep.

I thought about it and said, more or less, "There are 15,000 town-run senior centers in the country. Senior citizens who are socially or physically isolated have higher incidences of heart disease, depression and high blood pressure. Crabs can live for a maximum of two weeks in a ship-hold. A standard oven is 30 inches wide. All propane tanks have the same size nozzle. Century Gothic is the font for me. Kerning is the space between letters; leading the space between lines (which I once knew but had to learn again). Walter hates Friskies sliced beef but will eat it under protest. Rosie O'Donnell had never heard the word 'sate' until Martha Stewart used it. Max's original name in Rebecca was Henry, but Daphne du Maurier thought it too plain. The narrator remains unnamed because du Maurier could never settle on one for her."

I like this game. Today, so far, I've just learned one thing: brownies taste better than Special K.

Posted by Bree at 10:47 AM | Comments (0)

March 28, 2008

Reminder: The Unspeakable Event is Here!

Tonight is the Pecha Kucha (pronounced: Puh-cha-kah-cha) show at the Buntport Theater, developed by the lovely Angela and Jaime and featuring, among others, the always delectable Hannah D.

Show starts at 8:20 (doors at 8), and will feature 9 people showing 20 slides for 20 seconds a piece. $5 at the door and I've been assured there will be beer. Sources have also confirmed an obituary writer is in the line-up. Can you spell P-A-R-T-Y?

Posted by Bree at 09:51 AM | Comments (2)

March 19, 2008

Pecha Kucha Denver

And no, thank God, I'm not presenting. More info at Jaime's site here and Angela's site here. Picture of Luke Perry here and Billy Squier here.

Posted by Bree at 08:47 AM | Comments (2)

January 18, 2008

Do You Know the Street Value of This Mountain?!

In case you're still wondering why I moved to Colorado, it wasn't to buy the best house ever, start the best business ever, get the best dog ever, cuddle with the best cat ever or meet the best boy ever, it was actually to enjoy my surroundings. The other stuff = gravy. Big, hairy, sheddy gravy. Anys, up there's a snap (taken by Matt's cousin) of all the snow in Steamboat. All the snow my family will be gliding down come February break. Whee! Snow! Whee! Colorful Colorado! All right - that's it. Back to Werk.

Posted by Bree at 09:01 AM | Comments (0)

January 11, 2008

The Sultriest Sobriquet

Leland.
Nusty Leland.

Posted by Bree at 06:30 PM | Comments (0)

January 08, 2008

Greetings and Salutations

To all of you coming over here from the post about my so-called color anality on Design Boner, welcome. Welcome to the sad, sodden world of a girl who gargles with indecision and flosses with regret. I also like to drink fluids of all sorts, slow waaaay down in front of tailgaters and obsessively document every happening of my life on this here Internet. Example: last night I made the bold choice to sleep with no shirt or bra on. This morning, I found one of my dog's dark, gooey eye boogers perched on my boob. As I wiped it off, the song "99 Problems" by Jay-Z sprung to mind, and I sang rapped: "I've got 99 problems but a boog ain't one." True story.

So yes. This is the kind of breaking information that can be found on my web site. Again, welcome.

Posted by Bree at 07:35 PM | Comments (0)

January 02, 2008

Once I Pass'd Through a Populous City

A perhaps incomplete list of all the places I overnighted in in ought-7

Williamstown, MA*
New York, NY*
Brooklyn, NY*
Scarsdale, NY*
Lake McConnaughey, NE*
Fairplay, CO*
Keystone, CO*
Lafayette, CO*
Beaver Creek, CO
Miami, FL
Key West, FL
Santa Fe, NM
London, England*
Barcelona, Spain

Asterices (?) indicate cities visited more than once.

Here's last year's tally.

Posted by Bree at 09:55 AM | Comments (0)

New Year's Resolutions

In 2008, I resolve to listen to more Master of Puppets-era Metallica. I resolve to to pick out paint colors for my guest room, dresser and mantel and look into the benefits/drawbacks of fabric softener. I resolve to update my ipod more frequently, respond to e-mails with gusto and be much more vigilant in the leg shaving category. I resolve to take vitamins and stop eating cereal three times a day. I resolve to visit Liz and Nick in Sydney in the fall and actually buy condoms rather than relying on the vanilla and orange UTI specials brought to me free by Planned Parenthood.

I also resolve to figure out this whole "career thing."
And buy a new couch.

Posted by Bree at 09:39 AM | Comments (0)

December 30, 2007

Today

Officials closed Interstate 70 both directions between Georgetown and Vail tonight as blowing snow caused near whiteout conditions.

Westbound I-70 was also closed between Floyd Hill and Georgetown.

U.S. 6 over Loveland Pass was closed, as were U.S. 40 over Rabbit Ears and Berthoud Passes and U.S. 287 and U.S. 85 south of the Wyoming border.

Interstate 25 was closed north of Wellington.

The American Red Cross opened three shelters in the mountains for hundreds of stranded travelers: in Kremmling, Silverthorne and Frisco.

Today Rick and I got stuck on the highway for five hours in the most insane blizzard I've ever seen in me life. Bonus? The driver's side windshield wiper FELL OFF midway through. Read that again. The windshield wiper FELL THE FUCK OFF. More on this later, but suffice it - after getting up at 6 a.m., freezing balls all morning at Keystone (18 degrees AT THE BASE; whiteout conditions at the top), and then spending several *hours* tensed up and terrified, I am beat like the finest meringue. Thank GOD we left Keystone when we did though, as the traffic was backed up to Copper and now they've closed the roads totally. I can't even imagine what spending the night in wet ski clothes at a Red Cross Station in Frisco would entail but it sure wouldn't be pretty.

One more thing to say though: if it weren't for Rick and his skillful drivery, I'd probably still be pulled over to the side of the road in Georgetown (where the worst of the storm hit us AKA visibility ='d ZERO and where we lost the wiper) sobbing my brains out and wondering how a town that believes in Santa Claus could do me so wrong. Bravo, Rick! And thanks for helping me clean the car with a bottle of water and my ski scarf during our "down time." That nub of string cheese is ALL YOU, bro.

Posted by Bree at 09:42 PM | Comments (0)

December 12, 2007

Running on Empty...or Eggnog

Due to some cajoling on my fair Marie's part, I've been convinced to run (stagger) my first ever 5k race bright and early on Saturday morning. Seeing how I was planning on getting relatively trounced at Studio Como's Holiday party on Friday night, this represents a change of plans indeed. But alas, running a race was on my list of goals for '07 and the year's durned near used up. Seeing as I haven't run in, oh...about two months and - that's right - have pneumonia, this should be pleasant for all involved. I'm expecting to cross the finish line sometime on Monday.

If you're in the area, please airdrop biscuits and Gatorade.

Posted by Bree at 12:15 PM | Comments (0)

December 10, 2007

Lunch (Did Me Mighty Righty)

Menu
1 banana
1 sandwich (as in two pieces of whole wheat bread used to clean out the last of the Sabra Roasted Red Pepper Hummus)
1 sugar-free red bull

Mood
Satisfied

Resources
Wild Oats
Super Target

Posted by Bree at 12:22 PM | Comments (0)

December 02, 2007

Titus Andronicus! The Musical!

The boy and I just got back from a special showing (read: free!) of Buntport Theater's latest production, the heeeelarious Titus Andronicus! The Musical! For those close enough to hear the clickety clacking of my typewritery, I strongly strongly urge you to go check this one out. We were pretty much doubled over in guffawdom.

Here's a podcast with my lovely Hannah explaining some of the ins and outs of the play. It's a MUST LISTEN (caps mine).

And here's today's review from The Denver Post, which includes my favorite description ever of our fine alma mater: "Colorado College, an elite liberal arts college that breeds unorthodox intellectuals..." Ah, the accolades just keep on coming.

Posted by Bree at 10:31 PM | Comments (0)

December 01, 2007

Things (the new Working Title of This Blog)

Things I ordered last night:

Asics GT 2100

I've never owned a pair of black snakers before, and I can't say I'm all that comfortable with the notion but this SUPER CUTE girl in my gym rocks 'em hard, and so - in the immortal words of Hova - what more can I say?

Flock

Pink Sugar

Sing a Song of Secret Places

All 12 x 12 photos from Alicia Bock. Use code TRUNKT07 for 10 percent off orders. Whee!

Thing I Read This Morning That Concerns Me for Many Reasons Including But Not Limited to the Fact* That Mikhalkov Directed One of My Favorite All-time Movies (Burnt by the Sun)

*Is the phrase "including but not limited to the fact" a cliché? I kind of think so, but am uncertain if one can remove "the fact" and still have it read correctly. I'll keep you posted with regards to this fascinating inner thread.

Thing I am Going to Momentarily, Wearing the Same Jeans I Wore Yesterday and the Same Shirt I Slept In (I am a sexy beast, holla at this. Talking to you, Jigga. Time to get with Breeyonce.)

Posted by Bree at 11:06 AM | Comments (0)

November 19, 2007

Hearts-n-Flowers

Big. News. The boy bought a plane ticket today. A plane ticket to my hometown (or at least the closest approximation with an airstrip). A plane ticket to my hometown for the Christmas, which also happens to coincide with his BIRTHDAY.

Yes, I am dating Jesus.
And yes, he is psyched about fast-actin' Tinactin.
Those Birks can be a bitch, fungally speaking of course.

Speaking of, HOLY CRAP! This is the first man-person who has EVER joined me for the ho-days. The first! I'm all adultz and shit. And, PS, I think I might be...oh I don't know...maybe even...you know...gushy about it all. Say whaa? Pass the brass knuckles. Bitch needs to fight her way out of all this emotion and happiness and stuff. Or whatever.

Posted by Bree at 09:15 PM | Comments (0)

November 13, 2007

I Didn't Write This...

but I do agree with it.

Why Denver is the greatest city in the world...

It receives 300 days of sunshine a year, is the nation's most highly educated city with the highest percentage of high school and college graduates, is the third best-looking state in the U.S., brews more BEER than any other American city, has the largest city park system in the nation, is the 20th in the U.S. in population, but has the 10th largest downtown, has the nation's second largest performing arts center, has the thinnest residents of any U.S. city, and according to a federal study, really is a mile high.

Posted by Bree at 12:24 PM | Comments (0)

October 22, 2007

I'd Like to Take This Moment to Reaffirm my Devotion to Cheddar Cheese Pretzel Combos

There.

Posted by Bree at 01:31 PM | Comments (0)

D-Sign D-Rinks

From Jaime over at designklub:

Whether you are in the field of industrial, product, graphic or any other type of design come on down for an informal gathering of Denver design enthusiasts. We'll share exploits from the recent AIGA conference, steal each other's Halloween costume ideas and generally have a good time.

Join us on Monday, October 29th from 6-8 PM at the Skylark Lounge, located at 140 S. Broadway. Happy Hour goes until 7 and it's a big enough place that we'll be able to hear each other talk.

Posted by Bree at 01:11 PM | Comments (0)

October 21, 2007

High Life

Uno maaaath, por favor.

I realize my posting quota has been a little on the deficient side of late, but suffice it: London and Barcelona were fabu fabu fabu (check pics here) and I came home to...well...to an exciting new thing. More on that later, as the jinx of mentioning ANY boys on this blog has been well-documented, but look for more updates this week as I finally get over my EVER-LINGERING jet-laggardness and, uh, stop the near-constant face-stuff booze-quaff responsibility-blow-off of the past few weeks.

As far as the overuse of hyphens goes, however, you can rest assured I'll remain your obedient servant.

Posted by Bree at 07:41 PM | Comments (0)

September 30, 2007

Fall

Tonight, the Deuce and I took a nice, long walk in my beautiful neighborhood. There were a few dry leaves on the ground, little kids playing around, the smell of gas grills, and that certain edge in the air that says, "Yes. This is what you've been waiting for and here it is."

So it made me start thinking of fall, and all the words and things I associate with it. Let's see...

Maple syrup, muddy boots, burning piles, rough plaid coats, crusty bread and creamy soup, frost filigrees, thick ceramic mugs of coffee, wet grass, the smell of horses, extra blankets, cozy socks, pecan pie, slipping into suede, wood-burning stoves, hugs to stay warm, home.

Posted by Bree at 07:39 PM | Comments (0)

September 28, 2007

Things I Like to Do

1. Leave charming messages on my exbf's professional weblog after I've had a few glasses (bottles) of vinooo at Potager with the ladeez. Gwiggles.

2. Get pedicures.

Posted by Bree at 04:14 PM | Comments (0)

September 19, 2007

Brupdate

1. After two days of work with the lovely Marie and Angela at my side, the kitchen is now ACID GREEN. Holy Moly.

2. Arcade Fire and LCD Soundsystem show on Monday was spectacular. Such fun was had, in a TOTALLY SOBER way. I know, I too was shocked.

3. My Mom is coming **tomorrow** night for 8 days of Denver/Santa Fe/Taos relaxin' and maxin'! So excited. Especially excited that she likes to shop and decorate as much as I do...and the fall clothes are kkkkkickin' o'er to Saks way.

4. Today, I am buying this sink for my lavatory. I coveted it at Marcus and Jenny's pad de los pads in Brooklyn Heights, and now it shall be mine.

5. Speaking of those two, they went to the premiere of that Brad Pitt Jesse James movie last night - and ogled Angelina, aforementioned Pitt, James "Lips" Haven and Marianne Pearl. Oh and Gloria Estefan (?) too. Straight from the Spicer: "Angelina is definitely a skeleton. Like this tiny frail frame with a large pretty head on top....unnattractively skinny body-wise. looks brittle and Mr. Burns-like. Brad looked better than I expected. I was thinking he'd look all old and Babel-y."

And that is all. I'm off for another day of nonsuch.

Posted by Bree at 08:57 AM | Comments (0)

September 18, 2007

Dy-NERSTY!

When I was last home, Margo pointed out to me that beloved 80's catfight showcase Dynasty was in FACT set in DENVER. "How could I not know this?!", I quacked and then passed out in a puddle of vodka-soaked nutter butters. Two weeks and one Youtube search later beget the German (i.e., long...and sauer) version of Dynasty's opening credits, wherein the Mile High (plus a random beach or two) is feted in all its glorious glory:

Der Denver Clan! Der Denver Clan!

(PS rumor has it the mansion is somewhere south on Evans or something? Evans as in Linda Evans? I'll get to the bottom of this. If I have to tussle with Joanie Collins in a floor-length chiffon number and matching turban, gdarnit, I'll get to the bottom of this.

Posted by Bree at 12:57 PM | Comments (0)

Breakin'

This is a cool lil photo site matching individuals with their breakfast choices. Gost to say, most of them eat better than I do. Then again, as last night's midnight Wal-Greens in Wheatridge (whaa?) purchase of two boxes of Kashi Go Lean Crunch ($7) will attest to, I like my a.m. cereal.
As in, it's the only reason I wake up.
Maybe I should rename it Bleakfast.

Eh? !!!

Posted by Bree at 11:52 AM | Comments (0)

September 17, 2007

Getting Twiggy Wit' It

"If you’re going to be in Denver in mid October, you’ll want to take a stroll down California Street — it’s the site of this year’s Urban Forest Project, in which 24 local professional designers and 24 local design students will create banners that will hang up and down the street for two weeks. Each banner references trees (or tree-ness) in some way, and the results are sure to be eclectic."

Whole article, including unnecessary and untrue slag on D-town c/o those ass-munchin' Boulderites, can be found here.

Posted by Bree at 08:42 AM | Comments (0)

September 14, 2007

Mono-Whut?

Apologies for the light posting today and tomorrow (as well as, uh, the last few weeks) - I'm off in a few to the first day of Monolith, a big ole indie rock fest up to Red Rocks. Cake, Clap Your Hands, The Decemberists, Kings of Leon, Spoon - you name it, they're thar.

And the one bandus mejorus that's missing? The Arcade Fire? Why yowzah, Angela and her homies managed to find an extra ticket para moi to the AF's show on Monday evening. Venue? You guessed it: the Rocks. Suffice it, betwixt all this ear-bud jammin' - and a baby shower for Melanie on Sunday featuring, among other delights, a KEG - I've got quite the few days ahead. Wish me luck; send me sustenance; remember me in your yearbook.

Posted by Bree at 03:22 PM | Comments (0)

August 29, 2007

Injury Update

In an effort to match the pain sustained when I fell down the stairs on Steele St. carrying out my Christmas tree (erm...I admit, there were some needles and limbs scattered to and fro after that debacle), I just ate it down my cellar steps carrying a laundry basket. The only real losers in this situation: my elbow, which is all bloody after its 3-foot drag down the wall, and my left shoulder which bore the brunt of the Bree.

"What is it with you and stairs?," Stephen asked me many months ago and that I still do not know. But put me near 'em and chances are I'm-a eating shit in the foreseeable future. OW.

Posted by Bree at 01:46 PM | Comments (1)

August 26, 2007

Spraypaint Yourself Once, Shame On You

Spraypaint yourself twice, you're a fucking nimrod.

This is what my feet look like after being spraypainted black this morning. Even better, this is what my feet look like being spraypainted black and then cleaned with nail polish remover. Repeat: this is the post-cleaning picture, folks. My hands are in even worse shape, but at least on them, the stuff looks like paint - not odd gray and brown and black DIRT.

Clearly, I'm a quick study.

Posted by Bree at 02:47 PM | Comments (0)

August 22, 2007

Two Places I Would Like to Be

(Both lifted from the Design Idea Book mentioned on Design*sponge. I know. I too am shocked that I'm citing anything. It's totally against the whole collaborative content manifest I...er...just made up now. CoCoMa. Wave of the future. Mark these words.)

One place I'm not sure I'd like to be, but am trying to decide: Lez Zeppelin at the Bluebird. Your girl is feeling a little surly, a little asocial (Cpt. Spicer was trying to think up an amalgam of those words this morning - asurcial was the one bandied about) and a little under the weather so can't decide if a lady-fied John Bonham would irritate or titillate. Such are the decisions I wrestle with.

Posted by Bree at 03:22 PM | Comments (0)

August 14, 2007

Not Naming Any Names

But there was a time in my life (2006) when I dated someone who didn't know the difference between Cracker Barrel and Crate & Barrel. The relationship went south sometime after that chestnut was thrown into the fire.

And no, this wasn't the guy who majored in gym.

That's all.
Back to work.

Posted by Bree at 02:06 PM | Comments (0)

August 06, 2007

Little Push

Awww! Look at that! P Design AND INV/ALT got a write-up in "This Week in Denver." Wheeee! Fame! I wonder what the de-ntellegentsia would say if they knew what trouble those three got up to at the Ball Ball...

Abysmal picture not befitting the collective Colorado coolitude (coCoco) represented by this ball-loving trois-some

OH AND BIG NBenz: Look for a FULL-PAGE feature on Angela's snappable wine glasses in September's Bon Appétit.

Posted by Bree at 11:07 AM | Comments (0)

August 02, 2007

Another Hard Day at the Office

The time I've spent trying to find the PERFECT housewarming gift for Matt and Margo...

Posted by Bree at 04:01 PM | Comments (0)

August 01, 2007

Cancroed

Due to events beyond control, Rick and I only made it as far as Georgetown before we had to turn around. Lady's sick, and that's all there is to it. I'll be at the doctor later this afternoon. Seems I'm incubating some sort of infection; an infection that probably wouldn't have done anyone any favors on a several hour hike past the tree-line. Epiphany, indeed.

Luckily, we did get a chance to stop for some Corn Nuts and Red Bull along the way. Soooo! Morning well spent. Pass the Beam. And the leeches.

Posted by Bree at 08:30 AM | Comments (0)

July 31, 2007

Peak Condition

Looking for me tomorrow? I'll be here, gaping and gasping as the sherpas run laps around my huddled corpus. What? It's only like, gulp, 8,500 feet higher than I am right now...

Posted by Bree at 07:39 PM | Comments (0)

Turning Point

I've decided to have a turning point when I reach the top of whichever 14,000-foot mountain we hike in the morning. Can you decide these things beforehand? If so, I'd totally welcome an epiphany. The type that is life-altering. Because I'd like something new to happen; something different to go down.

Last night, I tried.
But it just wasn't me.
So tomorrow, I guess I'll try something different.

Posted by Bree at 08:26 AM | Comments (0)

July 30, 2007

Van Gogh I'm No

But who says I don't suffer for my art?

GNARLS. I just noticed my apparent spontaneous stigmata. Sure I'm clumsy. Sure I don't "feel pain." Sure I'm in the process of ripping out carpet with my bare hands. But still. Weird. And, between you and me, this isn't the first time this has happened...

Posted by Bree at 11:15 AM | Comments (0)

July 28, 2007

Lightening Crashes

Due to events beyond our control (aka crazy dangerous weather systems rolling through), the hike up Mount Bierstadt has been postponed until Wednesday. This delay has meant two things:

(1) After several heeeelarious hours last night, Angela and I (with an able assist from the 6 string cheeses, 2 peaches and 1 bag of beef jerky we munched through) completed the Fimo brick project with great aplomb and only slight bloat.

Angela with the pasta maker that is now irrevocably "dedicated to craft"

(Look for the faux instructables post coming soon.)

(2) I scored two half-priced tickets (went on sale at 1 p.m. on Ticketmaster, NB) to the Broncos v. Jags game on September 23 for me and my number one girl, K. Elaine.

"Never Stand Uphill From Mom"

Chick's such a football freak, it's absurd and she's NEVER been to a game. Ever. Never ever. They almost named my brother BART STARR (seriously) and she's never been to a game. Get on a plane, K.E.! We've got some Coors to drink and some ball to cheer. And we can totally wear our matching outfits from above. Even the goggles.

Posted by Bree at 02:42 PM | Comments (0)

July 16, 2007

Miss Me Much?

Cue up the Janet Jackson, 'cause I'm back. And I brought LaToya with me.

These past few days have been absolutely nutz. To quickly recap, I got my house painted (and OMG, it looks amazing. I am as thrilled as my brother, Jacko.) so was bumming around with my dog at different friends' houses for the past several nights. It was very "OK, Patches, let's me and you hit the rails," only with an A4 and a lot of Icky Thump and Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga. And Vicodin. Duh.

Honestly with a hard "H," the painting project really couldn't have come at a more inconvenient time. In essence, my house and my work were both in total and absurd constructo chaos - not. awesome. It got so kooks, I started taking refuge at the GYM...*madness*. To add insanity, the CO-DESIGN show opened at P Design on Saturday at 3. And the space was under construction up until about...oh 11 a.m. that morning. Take a moment to process that.

We were sweeping, mopping, shop-vaccing, power-washing, organizing, painting, lifting heavy crazy expensive furniture, eating hot dogs and breaking bottles of wine on the floor by 8 a.m. on the day of the show...WHILE the plasterers finished sanding and plastering the new walls. I finally left at 1:15 to quickly shower off the GNARLS before turning around and running back.

It was nuuuuuuts, but Team Kickass got it done and all was a great success, etc. Granted, I was so tired by the time the show actually rolled around, I spent a great part of it sitting and sipping Red Bull but, ahem, STILL managed to get my flirt on enough to get asked out by a comely stranger. I think it was the white jeans. Or the 3-inch heels. Or the giant circles under my eyes. Something...something irresistible! Clearly.

Rick and I toasted the success of the show - and the success of his last day at work - and the success of me still being awake - with filet mignones, Ridge '04 and martinis (me) and scotch/sodas (he) at the Palm that night. Two words: we's hammered. Case in point: we both stood on our seats. At separate intervals. BUT - that sort of ludicrous behavior didn't stop the sommelier from totally recognizing and remembering me as his former pupil at Cook Street. Ah, the connex never really fail when it comes to me and boozing.

Never.
Fail.

After a brief sojourn to the Skylark, we checked out the Clyfford Still opening at DAM (very small, but worthwhile) and then kept rolling til 2 a.m., talking trash and pumping up the jams...and the pajamas. It was a great day and a super great night - a lovely and intense experience that was much needed as recently my days have been - for lack of a better and/or less hyperbolic phrase - vast vortices of suck. Nothing too too major, but just death by 1,000 cuts type stuff.

But. The news is: things are totally on the upswing. I have some really exciting work stuff going on this week; my house looks amazing and - more importantly - I'm back in it, sitting in my chair, listening to Deuce snore happily. My laptop was returned to me this morning (albeit with a totally scraped hard drive) and my air conditioning is totally fixed. So I'm good. I'm very, very tired but I am very, very good. I even took my FIRST RIDE EVER on a motorcycle last night. Cruising down Colfax in the warm night air, feeling safe and free, laughing and smiling and squeezing Matt...something to remember, something else to be thankful for.

Posted by Bree at 07:30 PM | Comments (0)

July 08, 2007

Another Weekend Gone

Look for the pictures soon enough.

Posted by Bree at 09:37 PM | Comments (0)

July 05, 2007

Cracked

I did it.
I cracked.
I'm back on the sauce.
The man sauce.

Damn. I know it's not good, I know I need to be all "Whee! Bree! Discover your passion; realize your dreams!" but come on. I just want a summer fling, somebody to drink margs with and wrap my legs around and smooch on the sidewalk...That's not too much to ask, is it?

[Ducking head.]

Dude, I've been called it before and I'll no doubt be called it again: I am boy-fucking-crazy. Can't keep away. And further, I don't want to.

So, I'm going to keep trying to be all cool with the getting on with things on my own terms, but no promises up in this piece. Simply put, I like hanging with the fellas too much to stay alone for long. Even if I do look like Michael Jackson.

Posted by Bree at 10:56 PM | Comments (0)

July 02, 2007

Time Check

I like how when I posted the below, it was "morning" to me.

Posted by Bree at 01:54 PM | Comments (0)

July 01, 2007

Leave Only Footprints, Take Only Memories

The boys, Deuce and I went for a hike up to the top of "Chief Mountain" in Evergreen yesterday. Given that it was close to 100 degrees down here and in the low 70s up there, the choice was a little less crazy than it might appear from the outset.

Conversely, I did see something yesterday that has gotten more crazy than it appeared from the outset.

This man is not wearing shorts. He is wearing UNDERPANTS. As shorts.

Dang cuz. It's this kind of stuff that gets my ass out of bed before 7 on a Sunday...well that and he's totally hogging the covers.

Posted by Bree at 06:53 AM | Comments (0)

June 28, 2007

Why I Dig On Colorado, Reason #86A

The cutest boy EVER just came to talk over my upcoming interior paint job (living room, dining room, bedroom, upstairs hallway) and - in addition to bringing the funk, he also brought THIS lil beast:

Trust me, the Deuce and I were both quite smitten with young master Booger. Unfortunately, she's the only one who got to french him.

Posted by Bree at 01:25 PM | Comments (0)

June 17, 2007

Lil Entry; Big Change

Ah! Much to my surprise and relief, I'm having an "I'm in love with the world" kind of week (hangover from last night's ridonkeydoo notwithstanding). In the past, matters of the heart have left me flat and sad and sick, regardless of the cause or the situation or the knowledge that I'm better off without [INSERT NAME] or whatever. But this time? This time I'm just...feeling pretty free of all of that. Sure, I've had my moments of despair but that's just it - they've been moments. Moments that I've been easily distracted from.

More and more, I'm turning my face to the sun and leaving the hurt and disappointment of the past few months behind me. I don't lie in bed feeling an emptiness in my heart anymore. My stomach isn't twisted in tight little knots of anxiety anymore. My migraines are gone.

Yes. Like a pupa I be.

So, before I head off for a day spent doing the things I want to do (aka hitting up a salvage yard in Boulder, taking the dog for a long walk, and then getting sushi and seeing a movie with a good friend), I wanted to write that down. But I am cautious. I need to be careful not to tread on anyone's feelings with these kinds of posts. The person I was with meant a great deal to me and I wish him only the best.

I guess I'm just glad that the person I am also means a great deal to me. And that I've begun to wish her only the best as well.

Posted by Bree at 01:13 PM | Comments (0)

June 13, 2007

Good.

"Buy a bottle of whiskey and listen to Ryan Adams tonight. Or Mick..."
- Jay-bird.

So long ago - back in 2003, I broke up with my boyfriend. The first one I'd had since Mike. The DEA Agent one. It was my choice to break it off - I wasn't ready for another relationship. Sometimes, I found myself crying when we were together because he wasn't who I wanted him to be. He would never make the jokes Mike would've made; would never call me the same nicknames or make fun of me the same way or put ski gloves on his feet and walk around like a monster or take my topiary and hide it in the closet or throw a fish out an 8th story window at friends walking below. I couldn't imagine that he would ever know me the same way that Mike did. Sometimes, I would leave him - walk away on the street or quickly run from a restaurant - and go home and throw up because my stomach was so knotted with the pain of trying to be with someone else that I could hardly breathe.

Regardless, he tried to make it work. He was kind and patient. When I told him, right in the beginning, "You don't want to be with me...I'm all messed up," he said, "I like a challenge." He would call me several times a day; bring me presents, e-mail me, tell me how much he cared for me...but he knew I wasn't there; he knew I wasn't falling in love with him. So he confronted me, and I admitted it.

When we broke up, we met at a park outside of St. John the Divine on 112th and Amsterdam. Near that Hungarian coffee house/pastry shop. A place I had never been, as I didn't want to go somewhere that would then be ruined to me. I had been with Jenny earlier that day, and was wearing a Jill Stuart jean skirt, an open black button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up, a white tank top and flip-flops. It had been snowing when I met him. I sat on a bench carved out of stone and that was it. He told me, again, that I wasn't falling in love with him. I admitted that to be true but said we could still have a casual relationship...he didn't want that. When I went to walk away, he said, "Where are you going?" and I said, "Home." He then asked how I was getting there and I said, "A cab." But I remember thinking - this isn't your concern anymore.

The cab let me out at 77th and Broadway.

I walked up the street and Jason was standing outside our building, smoking a cigarette.

I started crying the second I saw him. He put his arms around me. That night, we ordered Chinese and watched TV on my couch. By the time I woke up the next morning, I was a little bit better. That was Jason.

When I think of what I am most proud of, what my greatest achievement has been, what has the most value of my life - it is so simply the friends I've made and the relationships I have. This week has been yet another testament to the value of these people. In every sense.

I am going to see Seattle next week. For the first time. And now I'll be going alone. But Jason and Jake will be there waiting for me. Confronted with my hesitation and uncertainty about the trip, Jake wrote me tonight: "Yo Briggles, We got nothing but luuuv for ya baby!! Come early, leave early, come late, stay all month...what 'evs. No need for a car. Can hardly contain the joy I feel just thinking about seeing you, Jacob."

And that is just one example of the amazing support and love I've had pouring in from all corners - this week, and every week. From people I have known forever, and people I, quite literally, met just a month ago. (Well, that was just one person. But she's the fucking best - and has an astroturf "lawn" so she counts for "people.") There is even one person, who's totally gone above and beyond as of late, whom I have never met. Now that...that's just astonishing.

So to let you all know, I am happy. Now, I am happy. My heart is content. Thank you. Thank you so much.

Posted by Bree at 10:47 PM | Comments (0)

June 12, 2007

Version 2.0

Out of respeck for the parties involved in the drama of this life of the last week, I'll keep this one close to the vest. In a summation, some shit's gone down. Both on the east coast and in the center square. Suffice it, I'm good. People super-close to me? Not so good. But getting better by the moment. And in my thoughts by the second.

I am focused and I am ready. I am greeting dilemmas - in my life and in the lives of people I love as much as I've ever loved anything on this earth - with a clear mind and a pure heart. My intentions are true. So even though I should be sad, as I have been and I certainly will be again, I am not. Not right now. Not lying on the floor with a sweet boxer on both side (regardless if they're both ripping FOUL ASS). Not lying on the floor, thinking of all I have ahead of me...and all I've already left behind.

THE SUBWAY HOME

it gets worse before it gets better
that's what your best friend said in the letter
all the pictures are still on the shelf
& you're barely making rent by yourself
your mom is worried for your health

you said it right from the start
these sorts of things fall apart

you take the subway home after work
from your job as a retail clerk
you're spending all the money you've saved
records keep the quiet away
up all night and sleep all day

he said it right from the start
these sorts of things fall apart

Posted by Bree at 09:35 PM | Comments (0)

June 09, 2007

Thicky Thick Girl

Ergh. Two ocular migraines in two days (including one that put me to bed last night at 11)...and feel another coming on this morning. Sure, my heart's been shipped off to the east coast and my mind's been on a several-day sprint through a warren of disturbing and confusing information...but come on blood vessels. Let's get our act together, shall we?

Lamus.
'specially as I'm off to go have a fance-o brunch with a television star momentarily. And am definitely going to hit up The Art of Drinking tonight, followed by a soupçon of revelry and mirth with the D-town poss. Got! No! Time! For! Head! Trauma! Der.

Posted by Bree at 10:34 AM | Comments (0)

May 30, 2007

Don't Let the Melodrama Hit You on the Ass

Just having one of those days. Bear with me, suckakkas. All will be well. I have mondo faith and mondo guts and mondo love for the people and the world around me, so even in my present state of blehh, I am happy(ish) and I am blessed(issimo).

THAT SAID...

Can I come home now?

And I keep on moving forward
Even when I’m down
I keep on moving forward
all the time

Posted by Bree at 02:10 PM | Comments (0)

Things to Do When You're Feeling Blue

A primer:

1. Take dog for walk in Cheeseman park
2. Argue with Starbucks staff regarding number of shots in a grande latte ("But I guess I just don't understand...tell me again why anyone would be satisfied with two?")
3. Lie in bed and stare at the hole where the missing screw should go in the switch plate
4. Moan
5. Call people
6. Don't pick up phone when people call back
7. Try to read
8. Decide to get really really skinny, because if you were really really skinny, you wouldn't have any more problems
9. Celebrate that decision with some Nutella on toast
10. Cry at random - like while picking up your car from the shop or contemplating whether or not to get a fruit salad.
11. Look at the picture you took of yourself on the saddest day of your life, and remind yourself that no matter what - you will never be that sad again:

(nor will you ever again get highlights.)
--

Pleased to say I've accomplished all of my goals for today except #1.
So, I'm off to the land where men love me: the gay and narrows of Cheeseman Park.

If you need to get in touch, I'll be the one moping around, staring with great melancholy at trash blowing by in the wind, trying to turn my frown upside down and convince myself that gaddamnit, I am not a failure at everything I do, regardless of this thing you call "overwhelming evidence" - all whilst wrestling a boxer known for being "100-percent full of beans." I also might randomly be crying and or puking. So if you do approach me, bring some Kleenex. (Generic brand is fine too.)

Posted by Bree at 12:30 PM | Comments (0)

May 24, 2007

Denver? Hippest EVER According to the Paper of Record

Check out the lowdown on Denver's emergent design scene in last Sunday's NY Times (link via Capt. Spicer and First Mate WiFi). Nod in placid profundity at the mention of our buddies over at P Design Gallery (picture on the far right is a fine representation of their steez - though that front and center Archie Bunker cum Jason Miller chair is fast on its way back to the east coast, nota benz. Get in there real quick like if you want to eye its majestic tackitude.) and marvel again at young Bree's prescient prescience in moving to this loverly town, as well as her undeniable aptitude for writing woefully misconstructed and needlessly complicated "sentences."

Prescient.
Prescience.

Posted by Bree at 09:46 AM | Comments (0)

May 22, 2007

Dear God

That were fun.
Minus, of course, the chutney (above). Which was both fun and delicious.

And now I'm back in rainy D-town, kind of fat and kind of tan, with no Internet connection, a probable UTI and a raging plague of the Bubonis ilk incubating about five minutes from my home. Aaaah!! Bienvenue, indeed.

Tonight, I'm celebrating the return to dehydration and dry heat with a sojourn to the Hold Steady/Heartless Bastards show at the Ogden with several of the kiddados. I'll be the one with the painful privates. You be the one with the fedora.

More updates and so forth regarding the trip to come once I get the Interwebs up and working back at the homestead. Considering the BF is a computerin' sort of character, the lack of connectivity is all very cobbler kid having no shoes...

Posted by Bree at 01:39 PM | Comments (0)

May 07, 2007

Latest Haps

Ah dearies. Your little speedracer kid met her comeuppance on Friday morning. Picture the scene: hot chick cruising down I-70 in the Audi, late to the back-cracker, 8 minutes after waking up...a black Expedition comes sneaking up on the left side...but lo - what is this? She never saw it coming. Breaking into first-person: I sideswiped him, causing almost no damage to my car (tiny scrape) and nearly none to his, which didn't prevent his side airbag from deploying in a cloud of sulfurous safety scent. After realizing what had happened, we both pulled off the road and managed to exchange all the relevant info before I burst into tears. I don't know if it was the tears, or the shock, or my incessant apologies and promises to "do whatever to make this right," but the guy took pity on me and was the *nicest* dude ever about the situation. He even gave me some toilet paper. For my face, dirtbags. Get your mind up out the gutts.

In a shell of summation, if I had to have something really scary happen to me - this was the way to go. Granted, I was really shaken and overwhelmed by the experience and spent most of the day alternating between hysterical crying jags and...well...there really wasn't an alternate. I was either recovering from one, in the midst of one or about to start on one. All's well, of course, and natch-0 my friends and family whom I spoke with about it managed to lend really awesome and valuable perspective. (Ex: It's a little too close to a scene from driver's ed. - "red asphalt." - Molly P.) Honest to Betsy, I don't know what I would've done without them. As my Mom said, "It happens to everyone...you think it won't happen to you, but then it does and you slow down and drive more carefully and continue on."

Words of wisdom from Katherine the elder.
I'm just so happy to have been given another chance to prove that, why yes, I am the world's finest driver, thanks for asking.

One more thing...red asphalt?
More like grodes asphalt.
That's just too foul for words. Nice one.

Posted by Bree at 11:21 AM | Comments (0)

Monday Monday

And the start of another workweek commences...

Posted by Bree at 11:08 AM | Comments (0)

April 26, 2007

Los Realizaciones

UNO: Aside from agreeing to go to an Avs game with a (relative) stranger back in February, getting a dog was the best decision I've made all year.

DUO: Dogs shed like a bitch come springtime. Chreeeist, the amount I vacuum off the floor every day could outfit a cavalcade of chilly Alopecia sufferers.

TRES:If one happens to win $165 on a 25-cent bet, as I did last night in Central "Loose Slots" City, it's best to tuck that tasty lil jackpot away for a weekend sojourn to the Buckhorn "Mmmm, tear me off a slab of that buffalo prime rib" Exchange restaurant rather than piss it back into the casino coffers. We've got 7:30 reservations on Saturday AWWW YEAH 'cause that's how this piece rolls, knowing when to fold 'em and all that.

QUATRO: Buffalo prime rib is, hands down, the best gaddamned thing this girl's ever dun aten. And that includes the 65 King Crab legs I housed at the buffet last night. And the bread pudding at Marie's wedding. And my Mom's pecan pie. And El's German pancakes. And Matt Meat. And Mike Meat. And even Garth's "death by dessert steak" decadence.
YES.
GO BUFF!

Posted by Bree at 06:21 PM | Comments (0)

April 24, 2007

In the Dark, We Are All the Same

I had a black man ask me this morning if I was the girl from Ipanema. When I said, in confusion, "The girl from Ipanema?", he replied, "Yep - tall and tan." When I said, in confusion, "Tan?", he replied, "It's all in the eye of the beholder."

The fact that I - Ghostly McPales A Lot of the Scots-Irish McPales A Lot clan - am getting compared to a tawny, blonde Brazilian gives me giggles. Compliment or not, somebody needs to polish up his spectacles.

Posted by Bree at 12:05 PM | Comments (0)

April 19, 2007

Gadawful

THAT is what was in my house last night.

Thank G-ness for the Garther. Steeling himself against my hysterical shrieking and plaintive wails, the brave boy insisted that it was not his place to introduce the beast to its maker. Instead, he calmly took the wall lobster for a walk around the block - where the leggy lightweight found the freedom to frolic with the rest of his land-based crustacean friends.

AHMAGOD.
Time to move.

Posted by Bree at 02:36 PM | Comments (0)

April 16, 2007

I Dream of Deenie

Oh dear Deenie! I am totally you.

Just call me Ms. Align Spine.

Jeebles. Above, reason number two why I'm digging on this whole chiropractor thing. Reason number one (aka cause for all my ultra-awesome neuropathies and bursitis) is buried deep in the heart of my sacrum, a place no man - nor x-ray - dares to penetrate. More detes? I thought not. So: in a brass tack, my back is on crack. And the pusherman is my chiro.

"Pass the glass pipe, dog, I be feeling your steez all up in here."

Posted by Bree at 10:38 PM | Comments (0)

April 13, 2007

Wack Back

The old mare ain't what she used to be, and I say that with all due vanity. I've been dealing with mild lower-back crizzap since a disc popped out of place in 1996 (!) but this...this is ridonx. I woke up a few weeks ago with some major aches in my mid-upper spine. Natcho, I've been alternately pushing it with Pilates and so on and resting it on the couch with Flavor of Love. It's been OK...but yesterday, I went to get rolfed and nearly levitated off the table in pain. My girl was very concerned about the sitchy, telling me my back and shoulders were so tight that I absolutely had to fix it. The word "spiraling" was used. In relation to my spine. Erk.

Thus? I finally bit the witch doctor bullet and called a chiropractor. It was the rolfer's reco, and this dude apparently takes x-rays of your back and only adjusts the pieces that are screwy, but still...I'm a bit nervous that I'm selling my soul to Dr. Deevil. Then again, I woke up this morning in such pain that I'm nearing desperation levels (aka: Soul? Sold.). If this doesn't work, I'm super checking out voodoo. You heard me: voodoo.

PS My boy Sam Champion's broadcasting from Denver! I saw him once at the Food Emporium on 67th and Broadway buying...Tofutti. I kid negs. Talk about voodoo...

Posted by Bree at 08:23 AM | Comments (0)

April 10, 2007

Rugger Bugger

My carpet cleaning guy is late. Thus, and in total opposition to the ethos of effective behavior modification, I'm gonna throw him a crazy lay if he finishes by 6 so I can make it to this design lecture.

That's right.
You heard me.
I said it.
And I'll say it again: "Ethos! Ethos! Ethos!"

Good times.

Posted by Bree at 04:43 PM | Comments (0)

April 09, 2007

The Day Has Finally Come

Yes. I am LIVE-BLOGGING from a coffee shop.

Me and my smug ass, like, sooooo deserve a smiting right now. In its place, I guess we'll just have to settle for a comfy couch, a four-shot Americano and total isolation in the basement of Hooked on Colfax. Oh and no worries with regards to this TOTAL reversal of protocol: the barrista is warming up my words in the toaster oven right now, so I expect to be munching down on them in short order.

Posted by Bree at 12:32 PM | Comments (0)

April 02, 2007

Inadequate Postage

Apologies, entreaties and the like for my interwebs silence as of the late. Alternatively, I've been wrapped up in the boy, away from home, napping, reading my awesome book and - let's get down to brass tacks here - trying to get to third base with the Deuce. In addition, my computers are both acting like they've got better shit to do than, you know, compute...so it's been a rough go of things. Relatively spake-ing, natcho.

Sad news for the cubists among you: today won't be much better. Hitting up the Rockies opening day (something...baseball...something something) with a gaggle of CCers hot offa bachelor party weekend up to Vail. Assume these boys will be in fine form, but bringing my handi-wipes just in case.

After today though?
After today is when I really start working.

Swear.
Totes.
Amen.

Posted by Bree at 08:12 AM | Comments (0)

March 29, 2007

It Can't Possibly Be

It can't possibly be that I'm the ONLY person on earth who manages to fall over onto her bedroom floor trying to put on her underpantaloons. I just refuse to believe that.

Posted by Bree at 06:05 PM | Comments (0)

March 23, 2007

Floridey Dreamin'...on Such a Dismal Day

Ughers. After a delightful evening (including tasty morsels of a stranger's steak at the Chophouse, tasty morsels of my very own martini at the Cruise Room and the giggles that can only be induced after a drink at the bleakest entry to downtown D-town's "club" "scene"), and some, you know, frenching, I woke this morning with a serious case of the blahhhhhhhhs.

Basica: I've been in bed all day. Which never happens. Ever. Coughing started last night, and suspect it may continue. Head hurts. Feel all fevery and dehydrato. Doubley lame because tonight's the Ratatat show I've been looking forward to and lits the LAST thing I want to do on erf is go hang and bounce my brain to some techno over at the Bluebird. Sigh. Life. So. Tough. To BOOT, afterwards, rather than coming home to rest - I'm hitting the road up to Silver Thorn with Rick to get an early start on at least one more day of skiing and BBQing up to A-Basin tomorrow.

Me? Glutton for enjoyment. Even at my own detriment. Especially at my own detriment. So imagine my delight to discover in my inbox today, an e-mail confirmation from Southwest Airlines that the boy has bought me tickets to go to Key West a deux over a long weekend in May. Luck? Be my lady, because man, this is some sweet deal I've got going on with this kid.

Schmiles for miles over here. Now if I could just convince my woozy head to jump in on the ride, we'd be all set.

Posted by Bree at 06:05 PM | Comments (0)

March 22, 2007

Calen-duh

In case you haven't figgered it out, I was totally wrong about which night the Travel Channel party for Melanie and Albin is. It's actually tonight...meaning I have to go late (pilates) and try to smuggle the boy in in my underpantsuit (limited guest list). In consideration of the latter, I suspect there will be a lot of eyebrow arching on my part, which will in turn...amount to nothing.
Which is kind of how I operate these days. Apparently scorn and derision don't get you as far in Colorado as they do in New York. On the other hand, it's kind of amazing how into boobs these cowboys are.

So between my attitude and my rackitude, I figure I'm batting about average (.500?) on the whole "getting what I want" thing. Case in point: the geniuuu at the bar in the Apple store hammered out a way to get my always troublesome G5 fixed for FWEE. Case in point in the negator: finding a good retail space has become the bane of my Billy Zane these days. Feel totally stalled and frustrated and pissed. Can't do much about it besides wait...and pass the time by lying down next to the pooch and rubbing her stomach when she feels bad, which is how I spent much of this morning. (Girl's got the GERD just like her mamacee. Dog Tums high on the list for my next big invention.)

AAAAAAAH. Am about to buy a Jack in the Box franchise and just be done with it all.

Posted by Bree at 08:18 AM | Comments (0)

March 20, 2007

Tomorrow (and Earlier Tonight)

Tomorrow will be a slow day on the posting front. Immediately following my important meeting of importance, Liz and I will be heading to A-Basin for one of the last ski days of the season. I'll keep you all informed of any ongoing derring-do when I return.

PS - TV on the Radio gave a pretty tight show tonight at the Ogden. Too bad they were preceded by the WORLD'S ABSOLUTELY SHITTIEST BAND, the barfronically named "Subtle."
Seriously.
Fucking.
Worthless.

Posted by Bree at 11:53 PM | Comments (0)

March 19, 2007

Beginning to Feel Like This Might be My Road Again Too...

And durnitall, this feeling feels good. Feel me? (Er...minus the "she" part. Dang.)

--

Hey, look at that: you got a mention up there, Darth. [emoticon.]
Now get back to the bunker. This empire ain't gonna run itself.

UPDATE: After reading that over, I have concluded that my recent level of crypticism is unparalleled in this modren age. Oh so guarded, young(ish) Bree...

Trans for weirdness above: I'm sweating a homeslice. And its not just 'cause he brought me a Red Bull and then made me laugh so hard I shot it out of my nose. But that helps. More TK as they say.

Posted by Bree at 02:52 PM | Comments (0)

March 08, 2007

All I Want for my Birthday...

is to go skiing at Copper with Marie, followed by martinis and dinner at Frasca in Boulder with the rest of the clowns. Well...that or the Senslip.
I'm torn.

Birthday ho-scope (aka looks like TSC is a go!):

At times you may appear pessimistic and so you need to balance your mind with more joy, optimism and inner sunshine. Try to remove some of the cynicism towards your own life processes and by balancing your cautious nature, you will no doubt begin to see better results in your life.

You are very good with money, highly resourceful and prudent in all of your dealings. You have strong ambition with a solid sense of purpose - all of the important elements that make for success.

It should be noted in your case that this striving for your goal in a one-pointed manner may result in overwork. To achieve these ends, you may develop a hard exterior and so people often don't understand the real inner you. Learn to prioritise and balance your professional and personal needs.

Please try harder to understand the inner me.
Thanx.

Posted by Bree at 06:26 AM | Comments (0)

March 07, 2007

Content Rip-Off 84(a)

It should come as no surprise to my dedicated fans that I like to gank Denver-oriented content from 5280 Magazine. Considering they blew me off for both a job and a, ahem, position as one of the top singles in town (mofos, as IF you're gonna do better than this piece), I feel totally justified sharing what useful nugs I can glean from their boring pages for my readership of 12. It's how "I do."

Here's some budget-o inf-o from their "Live Well for Less" article:

Good Use Furniture Store - salvage type place up in Boulder or something that rescues and revamps all sorts of pieces. Nothing costs more than a few hundred bucks. I'm sensing a Friday field trip in the making.

Steep and Cheap dot computer - A web site that offers high-end sports gear, one item at a time, for up to 70 percent off.

Aspen Home Consignment: And yes, the name pretty much sums it up. 202 East Main St. (Also check out Gracy's and The Thrift Shop on E. Hopkins Ave for supposed celeb cast-offs...yes! Mariah's pantaloons and Melanie's lip implants! Just what I had in mind for a stylish '07.)

And here's a little tidbit just from me and Marie and Matt and Melissa and the rest of my aMigos who were on the Argentina adventura: Zolo wine. Cheap. Awesome. Stayed at their guesthouse (Club Tapiz) in Mendoza. Can't get enough. Just found it at both the Sam's Club liquor store on Quebec and the low-budge one in Lowry. Of course Applejack and Argonaut have it as well. Kickass and drinkup.

Posted by Bree at 01:08 PM | Comments (0)

March 03, 2007

Pretty Much How I Feel Right Now...

Minus the elated part.
Blech.

Clearly, I need some leather loving 'cause this chick's kind of bummed as of late. S'no big deal, but jeebles. I am overwhelmed and understocked these days. I need some help, I think. I just don't know how to get it anymore. Siggghhhhh. Melodrama will certainly be on the DL as of tomorrow but for tonight, I'm gonna go curl up in my uncertainty and go to sleep.

Posted by Bree at 01:32 AM | Comments (0)

February 20, 2007

Menu Advice: The Perfect Lunch

1 (one) quadruple shot Americano in a 16-oz. cup, little bit of fat-free milk, two Equals and one Sweet-n-Low
1 (one) gigantic white chocolate and craisin oatmeal cookie purchased as a gift for Rick, consumed as a gift for me

--

Delish.

Posted by Bree at 11:01 AM | Comments (0)

Ahoy, Hoy!

News of late:

1. I get to go to an AV'S game (that's hockey...er...I think) on Thursday. Excitaments. For someone who doesn't follow professional sports at all beyond the occasional nag sprint, I absolutely love going to games of all sorts. Must be the beer.
2. Painters are HOT. And COOL. And invited me over "after your run" to check out a house on Wash Park they're doing to get some color ideas. Mrrrrawhhh.

That's all.

Things continue apace here. A guest bedroom mattress and box spring has been purchased. Lighting fixtures are arriving daily. Course I haven't even started packing, but my ceilings are done and the housekeepers are coming tomorrow morning so things should start rolling after that. I've also eaten down my food and used up my toiletries to the point where I had a frozen shrimp for breakfast and washed my hair with dish soap.

Also? My friend Liz interruped my six p.m. Americano mission last night with a call from Sydney. Seems she and Nick have got a two-bedroom place with a view of the water. To bypass the impracticality of even considering this, I'm making a firm decision: I'm DEFINITELY hitting that up come September.

Posted by Bree at 08:34 AM | Comments (0)

February 16, 2007

Chubbles Checks In

If I get wicked fat because I don't have time anymore to ever go running, can you guys just start referring to me as Queen Labreefah? 'cause that'd make it all worthwhile.

In other news, aside from my muffin top and lard-encrusted, bacon-wrapped backfat, I am psyched beyond comprehension at the news - out of NYC this very morning - that the one and only, Matthew Partridge, chief percussionist of the N*ely Family Singers, has thrust aside his grueling Cash Cab schedule and is *COMING TO DENVER* on March 11. Meaning me, he + K.E. will be hitting the slopes - and the bars - up in Beaver Creek all that week before celebrating Marie's wedding with Tom and the rest of the crew. This is plum fabs.

Speaking of plum fabs, I'm about to rock the pants off my *proposed* retail space with a general contractor. This is when the shan is going to hit the fit, if you know what I'm alluding too. If not, time to get crackin' on that diplomey. Best part? I get to show off the styling, golden-hued Chevy (or something) rental I picked up for *free* at the Audi dealership this morning. If that car doesn't scream Labreefah, I don't know what does. Pass the McNuggets.

Posted by Bree at 10:48 AM | Comments (0)

February 15, 2007

Outbox

No time to write for you - my enormous anonymous readership - so decided to instead give a little taste of how the ole inbox might look if you too were Captain of the Spicer Ship. Typos gratis.

From: briggles
To: Captain Spicer
Date: Feb 15, 2007 10:50 AM
Subject: malteaser?

Am moving on 2/24.
Am done with contractor number one (ceilings/walls), number two is there as we speak (floors) and am meeting number three (painting) there tomorrow as realized I need to get hte ceilings painted before I can hook back up the light fixtures. I can't reallly turn on my elec. until I hook up the light fixtures. I can't really start moving my TOTALLY UNPACKED shit over there until I am painted...or not? FUCK FUCK FUCK. It'll all happen, it's just really crazy right now. Have to go over in 1/2 hour to wait for laundry and dryer delivery, and last night woke up all like "Shit, what if it doesn't FIT?! I didn't measure...SHIT SHIT SHIT" etc.

So, in the midst of all this, I have to go over and sit on my ass doing NOTHING in the middle of my day for two hours waiting for these jokers.
awesome.

--

Conclusion: I love moving. Clearly. This is the THIRD ONE in THREE YEARS: Manhattan -> Brooklyn -> Denver -> Denver. Next one' gonna be six feet underground, cuz.

Pass the 'ludes.
Like, seriously.

Posted by Bree at 10:54 AM | Comments (0)

February 14, 2007

News You Can Use: Scattershot Edition

First off, Happy Valentine's Day folkers! It's a gorgey, sunshiney/snowy morning here and I am in a blissful mood. Granted, it'll probably last for only a few moments - long enough for me to remember the heartbreaking agony with which I perform my daily ablutions - but the stars seems to be aligning this week in a rather amazing way.

Case?
Point.

Point?
Break.

First off, my besty Twhiggs are on a plane RIGHT NOW coming back from a five-week trip to Thailand. This is probably the longest I've been without HJF at my beck and phone-call since the FIRST GRADE, so I am more than a little psyched to get her back stateside.

Secondly, on to house news: the washer and dryer I ordered from Lefty's Appliance Clearance Outlet (YES!) were inexplicably back ordered so they gave me a *free upgrade*. Realize this is probably of less import to you than me, but I'm going to rent My Beautiful Laundrette tonight in gratitude/excitement/celibacy - regardless of what you say.

Me After Hymen Reattachment Surgery

Otherwise, the walls and ceilings are done and beauteous (though all need to be painted...something that is just NOT happening before I move in), and the floors are being dealt with this week. I sent my sellers a request for mediation due to their (alleged) nondisclosure on some flooring issues and am awaiting a response. I've decided to base my courtroom appearance/attitude on the Joe Pesci character in My Cousin Vinny.

Ablutions, indeed.

Also!? They rented my apartment (to a New York girl TALLER THAN ME!) for March 1. Which means I get back my entire security and am free of a month's rent. Scizzore and Scizzike. Pass the Michael Bublé.

Thirdly, on to TSC news: I may actually have found a commercial place! The lease is in negotiations, but it looks like I'll get six months abated (free) in order to have the lucre to fix the joint meself. I'm meeting a general contractor there on Friday and will have a better idea of budget and scope after that...but it's looking good, kiddados! Looking. Good.

Speaking of looking good, check out this beauteousness from my gorgeously talented friend Stacy Morrison:

So! Pleased! to announce that she's the first official artiste to contract with TSC. Indeed, her photographs will grace the grungeoid walls of my garage/retail dynasty - making us both FILTHY RICH. Or something.

And, in closing, looks like - with all this craziness that's abounding - I'll be taking a little break this weekend and heading up to the mountains for a few days of skiing backslash brewskies. My hot little former ski instructor date on Monday told me Breckenridge has the best snow right now, so am looking forward to testing out his theories. Among other things.

Lates skates! Happy choco-tacos! Big love to you all!

Posted by Bree at 09:50 AM | Comments (0)

February 12, 2007

Manic Panic

It's days like today (where I had to - and have to - meet the flooring guys, walk over the work of the wall guys (finishing today!), coordinate a dresser delivery, draft and send a letter of interest regarding my commercial space, have copies of my keys made, show my apartment to possible renters, go to Pilates, go on a date, clean my apartment, clean myself (twice), make mix CDs for Matt, Bulbs and Todd, go to the post office, go to the bank and pick up my dry-cleaning), that I wish I had a wife.
Or an effective tool to slow myself down.
Like a ball-peen hammer.
Or heroin.

I'm like two minutes away from astro-diaps.

Posted by Bree at 01:16 PM | Comments (0)

February 11, 2007

Shoe-Be-Doo

Hey D*town: I'm in the process of culling through my enormous - and enormously underutilized - wardrobe and am going to send a gigundo box of shoes to Soles 4 Souls, a charity that collects and distributes new and used shoes to needy folk. So, if you have any you'd like me to send, let me know and I'll toss 'em in. Can't really see how my clodhoppers will go over in, uh, Asia and the like, but hopefully they'll find their home with some freakishly tall corporate refugee in serious need of three-inch-heeled, red, strappy sandals with rhinestone detailing.

It could happen.

Posted by Bree at 04:13 PM | Comments (0)

February 10, 2007

Sweet Chariteeee

I urge all of you to read this article, and those that can to send this girl a check. It's an extremely moving story, and one that shows the unbreakable, unbelievable connection between dads and daughts. Cue John Mayer. And then cue vomit.

Posted by Bree at 11:00 AM | Comments (0)

I Really Wish

...that I could somehow record the RIDICULOUS banging and hammering and weird vibratory booms that have been happening in my building since 8 A.M. Because only then can you appreciate how happy I am that I didn't go meet Drew at Lipgloss or Hannah at the Thin Man last night.

The Vic/Zin/Devil Wears Prada evening I cooked up for myself was tiring enough to leave me PISSED. OFF. that anyone would do work on a Saturday morning like this. GARRRRRRRRRRRR. So irked. Keep telling myself it's only two more weeks until I move into my own domicile...two more weeks...two weeks more...but man...thank God my Mom spanked the gay out of me or I'd really be ready to rumble.

Posted by Bree at 08:37 AM | Comments (0)

February 09, 2007

I'm Free...to Do What I Want Any Ole TIME

Oh thank you, thank you, thank you. It seems my impassioned pleas were heard by the Colorado court system. I am free; free as the freebird.

Sadly, with this freedom comes the revelation that what I want to do - perhaps not at any ole time, but this ole time in particular - is drink my Americano and watch Ofrah. I am that cool. So you know where I'll be if you need me. Reveling in the glory of freedom with the rest of the gang at Harpo.

Oh and BY THE WAY, if this had been the Phil Spector case - I would've served with delight.

Posted by Bree at 03:57 PM | Comments (0)

Judge Not, Lest Ye Be Chosen to Serve for FOUR WEEKS

Holy carbunkles. I'm on break from jury selection, and have to go back in a few hours to find out my fate re: a FOUR WEEK medical malpractice suit. They called all 130 of us in, had us fill out a questionaire, and then released us to the hounds so they could cull through and make the first round of cuts. My questionaire, literally, covered my Aunt's health, my family's background in health care, my role on the board of a nursing home, my (internal) advocacy for tort reform, the fact that I'm in the final stages of launching a store (I put final in quotes...hee...) and have no financial recompsense, nor anyone to help me.

All the stops?
Pulled.

Fingers crossed for me ladies and gents!

Thankfully, what could be a dire mood was alleviated by a quick stop to Neiman's, wherein I picked up the *end-all be-all* cocktail dress for Marie's wedding reception. It is hot, boys. Mmmmmmmrrawh! Even the alterations lady made me walk out to the middle of the store in it to look at myself in the gigantic mirrors (bear in mind I also was wearing knee-high black and gray polka dotted socks) and complimented me on my "lovely figure." We're having dinner tonight. I plan on wearing just the socks.

Speaking of lovely figures, also got an email from the boy I like to call Treble promising he would come spoon me soon. Haven't seen him since our debaucherous trip to Red Feather Lakes this summer, but man, oh man. He is a bundle of fun, that one. At the very least, his - how should I say - return to my inbox brought up plenty of illicit mems for me to ponder during this afternoon's time in the court system.

Oh and PS: Meeting James Salter last night was one of the highlights of my life. Lits. On the way down, Rick said, "This is like meeting Hemingway," and it was. Unbelievable. What a blessing that we got to do this. Plus? He liked me! Or something. He talked to me for a long time at any rate. Awwww! (Insert: beaming.)

Oh and afterwards? I got to introduce Rick's to the glory that is mixed drinks at Murph's! !!
All told: one of the best nights ever. Awesome.

Posted by Bree at 12:32 PM | Comments (0)

Today? Today, I Am the Rural Juror.

Some might call my CONSTANT jury selection (starting at age 18) a bit of a bummer, but I like to consider the benefits. Among them? Free lunch if you get chosen for a trial! Also, after a day spent in service to my city, my state and my country, I tend to have no guilt about an evening spent in service to a bottle or two of urban bourbon.

Posted by Bree at 07:22 AM | Comments (0)

February 08, 2007

[Insert AHHHHHHH Emoticon]

Whoozee, kiddados. Yesterday was a bit of shennaniganstorm.

After a morning spent running interminable errands - and the interminable loop around Wash Park - I met up with my beloved broker to see a space over on 21st and Larimer. Space was kind of fabs; much more finished than the one on 27th. New heating, electrical, kitchen, ADA bathroom - the "wurks." Only problem? $12 triple-net. Averaging out to about $2,500 a month. Which means, according to the guru Paul, I'd have to sell $10,000 of merchandise a MONTH to make it work.

Uh. Them's a lot of throw pillows.

So, as it stands after an afternoon of beer and solace at P Design, I am proposing I take the space on 27th. Asking for a new roof and offering to clean it up, install a rooftop HVAC and a retail/glass storefront myself in exchange for free rent. It seems a win-win: landlord gets a good tenant and a rehabbed space. I get a space outfit to my specifications at the beginning of the process (i.e., when I have money to spend) and then time to rehab the bank account during the free rent months.

We'll see, however. There has been some talk that he might not be interested in leasing it out at all. Which is what it is - I look at this like I look at guys I meet: refuse to get all jacked up emotionally about them as hell, there might be a better one right around the corner. Naturally, this attitude serves to protect me at all times. It's also total horseshit. I am such a NINNY, it's ridonx. Indeed, my stomach was in puke/stress mode for HOURS as I tried to sort this all out. Prilosec no worky. Blech.

The good news is huge though: yesterday, in the midst of all this, I met a fellow CC grad named Jaime who was just hangin' at the gallery and who has her very own design blog! Coincidentally, she used to work at the immensely fabulous walllpaper design firm Flavor Paper, which is also run by a CC grad. PLUS - she works now at the Buntport Theater, which is a completely CC-ified endeavor spearheaded by the delectable Ms. Duggan. GO TIGERS.

Other good news? The bar last night, Sengers on Colfax, was SEXCELLENT. Don't be dettered by the funkadoo entrance (they're rehabbing it starting this month) - that place was posh, comfy and cool. Rap on the juke all the night long. Stiff drinks, lots of freebies and a great looking menu including GNOCCHI mac and cheese. Oh my *A-OK.*

Eric, Marie, Andrea and I celebrated the official incorporation of Eric's new business, Andrea's emancipation, Marie's upcoming nuptials and my new lipstick color. With friends like these...who needs Twizzlers and Twix Bars after hours?
Oh wait.
I do.

Exciting days!

Posted by Bree at 08:28 AM | Comments (0)

February 04, 2007

Stressy Bessy

Ew. Ever since I got back, I've been all stressed and nervous and anxious and annoying. Last night, I even had the "wake up in another room an hour after falling asleep" thing, which used to plague me every night, but hasn't been a-haps for several months. To boot, my stomach is all knotted up and pissed off and I can hardly sit still.

Granted, I have a lot going on at the moment. In addition to overseeing contractors at the crib, I'm moving on February 24. Plus, the commercial space thing is happening this week and I have to sort through and think about all the information I collected in New York. The amount of work in front of me that is truly staggering, but I must say: I'm disappointed in my reaction. I want to approach this process - both the house and the business - with passion and excitement as my underlying feelings...not fear. The other frustrating aspect is that I keep pitying myself - thinking that if only I had someone (re: boy person) to help me with some part of it, then things would be more manageable. On the other hand, the idea of dating someone right now - of trying to even muster up the emotional resources to put myself out there - again - is almost repellent.

This is new - and, actually, I think a positive step. I have found that sometimes I use dating as a distraction. I'm good at it. I know how to dress up and be charming and write good e-mails and etc. It's easier for me to spend my time plotting romantic interludes and spa treatments and so forth than it is for me to figure out what I'm doing with myself. So, the fact I'm not so interested in it at the moment gives me pause. Maybe I am truly diving into something here, and not just coasting along. Maybe I am finally taking control, and not just waiting for a guy to come along and sort out everything for me.

This is good. This is all good. I just need to stop mainlining Tums and running around like a manic freakshow and it'll all work out. Speaking of, must go to the gym now and burn off some of my energy before the big game. Go...er...footballers?

Posted by Bree at 11:09 AM | Comments (1)

January 17, 2007

Alert

I !
AM !
SO !
HAPPY !

There, I just wanted to type it.
Naturally, I am agog, I am aghast - and all that other stuff that goes along with being a Pisces. But the truuf of the matter? I'm happy. I am.

Honestly, I just had one of the greatest nights of my life. And it was nothing too big - couple of art events, a few beers with some new friends at a great new bar and a good phone call or two - but I'm sitting here, with a big fat smile on my face and a belly full of lasagna and Exile on the juke, just. feeling. good. about. things.

Nice way to start the double-o.

[emoticon.]

Posted by Bree at 10:48 PM | Comments (0)

Injurious? I'll Say!

Dude.

I am the clumsiest person on erf.

The first day of the rest of my life was today, naturally, and I started it by *eating ass* in Cherry Creek North. I went down hard on my right hip and hand in the middle of Cook Street.

Hi...
Awesome.

I'm a little scraped up and bruised (as is par for the ushj 'round this piece), but, alas, the real injury came not to my body - but to my ego. The fact of the matter? What was surely a cartoonish, most inelegant display of total clutziness happened just as I was sauntering - all cute and stuff - towards a hotty getting out of his car.

FYI: apparently, hotties "aren't into" a woman laying in the road, plaintively bleating like a wounded squirrel. Or at least that's the meta-message he sent as he coldly stepped over the ever-growing puddle of blood and brain matter beneath me. WhatEVER!

Posted by Bree at 12:53 PM | Comments (0)

January 16, 2007

Bladder is Gladder but Tummy is Bummy

Excellent update on the medical situation as of late 'round casa Bree! In short, I get to keep all my organs! Yup, apparently the good docs at the ER were correct in the shared assertation that the University of Colorado's ultrasound equipment sucked.

After a morning spent being lubed up and poked with a giant wand (typical) by people who apparently know how to operate an ultrasound machine (less so), I've been cleared for take-off with a bad case of...
brace yourself...
indigestion.

This diagnosis sent McNamara into hysterical giggles over the phone tonight. I trust it'll do the same for you. I also trust that the next time I get all panicky because there aren't any Tums in the vicinity, you'll respond with a *bit* more sympathy and haste.

So, treatment is such: I am going to finish the course of Prevacid I was prescribed and then spend four weeks on Prilosec. Hopefully, that will get the near-constant stomachache under control. It will also free up my Vicodin for recreational use, much to the delight of all and sundry. I wish I could give every one of you who expressed love and concern for my wellbeing one of the magic pills but...let's face it. I've got a lot of friends. And the prescription's non-refillable. Toodles!

Posted by Bree at 10:59 PM | Comments (0)

January 15, 2007

Grand Prix Bree

Celebrating my status as a *new homeowner* in the best possible fashion: slamming shots of Gentlemen Jack at the National Western Grand Prix show jumping competition tonight.

Sick?
Me?
No thanks.

Holla at me, britches!

Posted by Bree at 01:35 PM | Comments (0)

January 14, 2007

Breaking: Denver Still Cold, Dogs Still Cute

c/o Denver Post

Posted by Bree at 10:29 PM | Comments (0)

Having a Ball, Gladder

Quick update on the ole organ situation - and no, Dad, I don't mean my dating life. Ba da BUM!

Ahhhh. Good times.

Regardless, here goes the latest MD news: tomorrow morning, I have an appointment to have my organs "ultrasounded" to try to get an official diagnosis. This roughly translates to a morning without ANY coffee NOR ANY water and what's sure to be a spaced-out drive to the doc.

Silly plan, one might argue, but the reasons for going alone are twofold. (1) I don't have to subject anyone to the torment of me in the a.m. sans several robust cups of joe and (2) I don't have to give away anymore of my Vicodin.

Selfless or selfish?
You be the judge.
But if you're the judge, I'm totally calling shotgun on the bailiff.
And that means I've got a billy club.
And some sturdy shoes.

More detes to come following the examination. Fingers interlaced.

Posted by Bree at 07:32 PM | Comments (0)

January 12, 2007

News

The bad news? After six hours in the emergency room last night, two bags of hydration fluid, a couple ampules (?) of morphine, and an ultrasound - it appears I might have gall stones - a condition that, while painful, is easily remedied by having my gall bladder removed. After I close on my house this morning, I'm going to another doctor and will hopefully be able to have a "full-court" ultrasound that will show definitively if the little bugger