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August 20, 2008
Oooh Now, This is Exciting
Because of my strange shape (aka gigantically tall, narrow-waisted, huge-boobied and with the rib cage of a sperm whale), I have a somewhat hard time finding fitted dresses. If they have any sort of waist, they're out, as it hits me about two inches below the bottom of my bust line. Also out? Any sort that button up the front as it would pretty much take fabric the size of the AIDS quilt to combat the one-two punch of my breasts and aforementioned rib span. So I'm stuck with stretchy jersey options which can look good (here, here [all right, you really can't see that one but hey look! It's me and Jenny!] and here), but can also look relatively vavoomy and are certainly too cocktaily to wear to the office. Nevertheless, I keep trying. For I am a soldier. Hence my recent purchase of a $130 lovely from Banana Republic:
And, zomg, it fits! Well, kind of. It fits in the important parts, though the waist and, weirdly, the very top are kind of bulgy. So, I'm going to do what I've never done (out of a dedication to being profoundly stubborn and also strangely frugal) and bring the bitch to a tailor. A TAILOR! I know. So extravagant. But considering I talked BR into giving me a 15-percent discount after I bought it (they really have *the best* customer service), I think I can take the money saved and actually procure something that conforms to my "never seen on any woman ever...no really, not ever" dimensions like a glove. Which I also can't buy because my fingers are about as long as cartoon octopus tentacles. Oh the travails!
Posted by Bree at August 20, 2008 09:06 AM
Comments
OMG! I, too, know the pain of which you speak re: digits.
Posted by: ANP at August 20, 2008 10:02 AM
Dude. Tell me about it. I'm basically forced to wrap my hands in mufflers to get through the winter.
Though once, in about 2004, I did get a pair of black leather gloves from BR (again!) which did me oh-so-right...until I left them in the back of a cab. I've been manhandling, literally, every offering from them ever since in hopes of finding that one pair that somehow was subjected to the gigantism ray at the factory. No dice. YET.
Posted by: Bree at August 20, 2008 10:29 AM