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May 22, 2008
Unclear Antecedent Alert
First sentence of a short article in the Denver Post today:
Phillip Chavez beat to death a man who hit Chavez's car on the side of the road in March, killing his two stepchildren, according to police.
I had to read the whole article to understand what the fuck that meant. (And I'm lazy, so that's saying something.) Maybe you're quicker on the draw than me, but for those in the back row: it seems a man hit Chavez's car. The accident killed Chavez's two stepchildren. Chavez then beat the man to death.
The grammatical problem stems from the "his" in the parenthetical clause. His? Who's his? Chavez? Or the man (which is how I initially read it)? Avoid this dilemma when using pronouns by steering clear of the unclear antecedent. If you (or the reader) can't make an obvious and quick connection between the subject and the pronoun, then repeat the subject's proper name...or rewrite the sentence.
Posted by Bree at May 22, 2008 11:20 PM
Comments
You are grammatically amazing, [briggles]. I'd hire you to copywrite my grocery lists, if I could afford to pay for such talent.
Note to self: File N*ely under "Novel Editing" and "Wine, Sharing Bottle of."
Posted by: jessica at May 23, 2008 10:58 AM
It's all from taking Latin I in the 10th grade. If I had gotten to II, things might REALLY be cooking but nooooo, I had to take chemistry instead. Nota fucking bene.
Oh and yes, I work for wine.
And heroin. Whatever's easier.
Posted by: Bree at May 23, 2008 02:07 PM
I think this one also belongs over at the BN blog.
Posted by: Angela at May 25, 2008 09:38 AM