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January 26, 2006
Competition? Bring It.
Part two of this week's mission has been to research area wine bars and suss out who exactly I'm going to be competing with, how they're doing, what they look like, what they're charging - you know. The jist.
To avoid showing up on Google searches totally slagging local businesses, I'm going to use code names. Bar #1? Code name: Rio. Not to be confused with "The Rio," a bar here that makes its margaritas with grain alcohol and wisely refuses to serve any one patron more than three. Not. Even. Me.
By the way, the best quote of last night goes, again, to Marie: "You know that song, 'Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off?' I totally thought of you when I heard it!"
Ahem.
Moving on. This so-called Rio used to be a bookstore and coffee shop catering to Marie and her hooligan band of cigarette-smoking, guitar-playing, school-skipping, hair-pommading ex-boyfriends in high school. It turned itself into a wine bar a year or two back, and has met with success. Even being named "Best Wine Bar 2005" by the local alternative press here.
My verdict?
Suck Central.
Boring and uncomfortable decor (blonde wood with black formica accents), pedestrian menu (the cheese board offered cheddar, swiss and provolone...really.), crap art on the walls, and an uninspired wine list. The most offensive aspect, however, was that they were projecting Shrek on the wall.
Fish in a barrel, people.
To boot, the one server/bartender on staff forgot to take our order, brought Marie the wrong wine (and not just the wrong wine - the wrong color wine) and then overcharged us for it. Let's just say, we skedaddled to a much cooler place, where we purged our memories - and toasted to our future success - with Zinfandel and ceviche.
Um, Rio? Your ass is grass. And Sweet and Bitter's the lawnmower.
You heard me.
Click below for pictures of the joint. Don't worry - you'll never have to go there.
Because free wi-fi brings the fun.
Not a soft surface in sight.
The one interesting design feature.
Posted by Bree at January 26, 2006 09:00 AM
Comments
That place looks like that awful 18+ dance club over on Rt. 8 behind the Berkshire Mall whose posted dress code notably included "No work-boots."
Posted by: Matt Neely at January 27, 2006 10:19 AM